As I grow older, I have pondered how I would live in my retirement and what I would do in the event that I became chronically ill or infirm. I have given great thought to my options as they concern housing, medical coverage and finances in general. I have wrestled with locations, weather and being close for my family to visit. I have decided that I would like free health care, free laundry services, free prescription drugs, free clothing, free catering of all my meals, free housing, free cable TV and internet, free reading and recreation materials, room for my visiting friends and relatives to sit comfortably, free transportation should I need it and a bunch of other free amenities. I have reasoned that my savings, investments, wages, tips, etc., will not deliver this lifestyle indefinately as I may require.
My great realization came to me. Should I become destitute or just diminish my resources, I'll just walk into a police station and claim that I committed a crime that should be a felony requiring years in a correctional facility. If I am terribly ill, I'll have to plead to something very serious so that I won't take the chance on wearing out my sentence earlier than I plan.
As a convicted felon I will have all of the free services I would require to live comfortably with not a care in the world about ever being poor.
I hear that the food and amenities are better in the federal facilities. I'll have to plead to a federal crime.
That was so simple. I can't imagine why people worry about old age or becoming ill or infirm and having their savings wiped out.
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